“I’m still coming out every day”: The closet in 2019

By Claire Brassard

You know what ‘Coming Out’ looks like in pop culture by now: A nervous young person comes to terms with their own sexuality and takes a brave step by announcing to the world that they’re gay — usually beginning with their immediate family. They’re met with a little initial shock but eventually heartwarming acceptance.

And that’s nice! It should be like that! But it’s not like that for everyone, and the definition of what the closet is changes every day.

Can you be out to some people and not others? What happens when you face judgement not when you come out of the closet but when you choose to remain inside it? Are there relationships in people’s lives that are worth preserving just as they are, if changing them would end badly? Even if that means a part of who you are will never be visible to your loved ones? What is ‘the closet’ in 2019, exactly?

Our guest today tells us about the painful decision she’s made to not tell her grandmother she’s gay.

GUEST: Erica Lenti, writer/essayist, The Walrus

 

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