Protecting Your Kids From Online Predators

The internet has opened up a plethora of new worlds, allowing us to connect in ways that were once unheard of.    But its essentially unregulated nature brings with it many risks.    Young surfers searching for companionship in chat rooms can easily find themselves victim of online ‘predators’.  

Every day the Toronto police child exploitation unit surfs chat rooms trying to nab perverts.   They   warn that online interactions could be as dangerous as meeting strangers.

“There might not be a danger to her because she’s not actually meeting a predator live, but he’s still doing what a predator does and exploiting you and causing you life-altering things,” said Sgt. Warren Bulmer.  

CityNews unit assistant Mary Perrone posed as a 14-year-old girl in a chat room. Within seconds, adult men wanted to talk to her.

“I think what was the most shocking is that I was so up front about my age, and it didn’t seem to be an issue with any of the males that I talked to online,” she explains.

“The over 30-year-olds seemed to be the most excited by the fact that I was a young teenaged girl.”

“One of the guys that I talked to was 31, from Canada, from Ajax, and right away, after we chatted, I told him I was 14 and he said “Oh, we should meet up.”

Police have a suggestion to parents when it comes to keeping their children safe online.

“If your child wants to use the computer for chat or instant messaging, that the condition of that use is that you have their password and then you can sign into their account at your leisure and you can pose as your child and sit in the wherever for 5 or 6 minutes and see what goes on,” Bulmer adds.

Authorities say there are thousands of pedophiles trolling the Internet eager to prey on young victims.

Canada made it a criminal offence to use the Internet to lure or exploit children for sexual purposes in 2002, but it’s important to note that only relates to children under the age of consent, which is currently 14.

Here are some things parents and kids should know about the dangers in the online world (courtesy of the Media Awareness Network):

How Do Predators Work?

Online Predators Are Usually:

• Male
• Seductive
• Introverted
• Sadistic
• Sexually Indiscriminate

According to the Media Awareness Network, predators often try to seduce victims with affection, compliments, and even gifts and they’re often willing to spend a lot of time and money on this process.

They’ll try to lower a young person’s inhibitions by gradually introducing sexual talk.

But there are others who will try to engage a victim in explicit conversation right away and could include online harassment or stalking.

What Children Are At Risk?

• New online and unfamiliar with Netiquette
• Actively seeking attention/affection
• Rebellious
• Isolated or lonely
• Curious
• Confused regarding sexual identity
• Easily tricked by adults
• Allured by subcultures outside of parents’ world

How can parents minimize the risk of a child becoming a victim?

• Talk to your kids about sexual predators and potential online dangers.
• Young children shouldn’t use chat rooms, period-the dangers are too great. As children get older, steer them towards well-monitored chat rooms for kids. Even teens should be encouraged to use monitored chat rooms.
• Instruct your children to never leave the public area of a chat room. Many chat rooms offer private areas where users can have one-on-one conversations.
• If your children participate in chat rooms, make it your business to know what chat rooms they visit and who they talk to. Monitor the chat areas yourself to see what kind of conversations are going on.
• Keep the computer with Internet access in a common area of the house, never in a child’s bedroom. It’s much more difficult for a predator to establish a relationship with your child if the computer screen is easily visible to parents and other household members.
• When your children are young, they should share the family email address rather than having their own email accounts. As they get older, you can ask your ISP to set up a separate email address, but kids’ mail should still reside in your account.
• Teach your children never to respond to instant messaging or emails from strangers.
• For places outside your area of supervision-such as the public library, school, or friend’s homes-find out what computer safeguards are used.
• If all precautions fail and your kids do encounter an online predator, remember that they’re not to blame in any way. The offender always bears the complete responsibility for his actions.

How can kids minimize the risk of being victimized?
They should:

• Never download images from an unknown source, as they could be sexually explicit.
• Tell an adult immediately if anything happens online that makes them feel uncomfortable or frightened.
• Choose a gender-neutral nickname.
• Never reveal personally identifiable information (including age and gender) online.
• Post the family online agreement by the computer to remind them to protect their privacy on the Internet.

How can you tell if a child is being targeted?
Here some clues that may indicate that a child has been targeted by an online predator:

• A child or teen spends large amounts of time online
• Most children who fall victim to online predators spend a lot of time online, particularly in chat rooms. In such cases, parents should monitor how much time is spent online, and in what activities.
• You find pornography on the family computer
• Predators often use pornography to sexually victimize children-often supplying it as a way to open sexual discussions with potential victims. Child pornography may be used to convince a child victim that adults having sex with children is “normal.” Parents should be aware that a child may hide pornographic files on diskettes, especially if the computer is used by other family members. For information on how to find Web files, videos or images stored on your computer, see Tracking Where Kids Have Been Online.
• A child or teen receives phone calls from people you don’t know; or makes calls to numbers you don’t recognize-sometimes long distance.
• Online predators may try to contact young people to engage in “phone sex,” or to try to set up a real-world meeting. If kids are hesitant to give out their home phone number, online sex offenders will give out theirs. Some have even obtained toll-free 1-800 numbers, so their potential victims can call them without their parents finding out. Others will tell the child to call collect-and then, with Caller ID, they can easily find out the child’s phone number.
• A child or teen receives mail, gifts, or packages from someone you don’t know.
• It’s common for offenders to send letters, photographs, and all manner of gifts to their potential victims. Computer-sex offenders have even sent plane tickets to try to entice a child or teen to travel across the country to meet them.
• A child or teen becomes withdrawn from family and friends; or quickly turns the computer monitor off or changes the screen if an adult comes into the room.
• Online predators work hard to drive wedges between kids and their families, often exaggerating any minor problems at home. Sexually victimized children often become withdrawn and depressed. And if kids are avoiding their friends or skipping classes, they may be attempting to meet with a predator.
• A child is using someone else’s online account
• Even kids who don’t have access to the Internet at home may meet an offender while online at a friend’s house or the library. Predators will sometimes provide their victims with a computer account, so they can communicate with them.

What can you do if a child is being targeted?

• You should contact your local police immediately if an online correspondent sends a young person child pornography or sexually explicit images; and especially if a young person is actually sexually solicited.
• Check your computer for pornographic files or any kind of sexual communications-these can be warning signs.
• Monitor the child’s access to all live electronic communications, such as chat rooms, instant messages, and email. Online predators almost always meet potential victims in chat rooms at first, and then continue communicating with them electronically via email.

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