Man Creates First Hardcore Porno Film – For Plants
Posted September 10, 2007 12:00 pm.
This article is more than 5 years old.
Yes, it was bound to happen – pornography for plants. A conceptual artist named Jonathan Keats has come up with what he calls the most boring porno flick ever made, designed to be shown to a floral audience as a way to stimulate their growth. The film, which will be projected on the leaves of the growing greeneries, consists mainly of bees pollinating flowers.
“I knew enough about their reproduction process to make an educated guess at what might titillate them and that was pollination,” he explains of his movie mission. “Cinema Botanica” is six minutes long and made in black and white. “It is very boring but that is part of the essence of pornography, that it is very repetitive,” the filmmaker relates.
Unlike the grand galas at this month’s Toronto International Film Festival, this honey of a flick will be “seen” by only about 60 invited guests – the house plants at an alternative arts space in Chico, California, which the 35-year-old calls “the world’s first porn theatre for house plants.”
This isn’t the first time Keats has attempted the unusual. In 2003, he issued a copyright on his own mind, presumably to ensure he’d never lose it. (Some might argue his latest project shows he already has.) He’s previously put on shows of ‘extraterrestrial’ artwork, although most critics said it was alien to them. And he once tried to genetically engineer God in a Petri dish, a project that didn’t quite work out.
But this is the first time anyone has made a film about the birds and the bees featuring the real bees. To see the trailer, click here. But please – only if you’re over 18.
