REVIEW: Losing Yourself, and the journey back

Imagine waking up one day, and not remembering much about your life. You’re in the hospital, everything seems hazy, and you’re just wondering when you can go back to high school. But when the doctor and your family come, they tell you you’re not actually a teenager but a 29 year old. And not only that, but you’ve got three kids as well and you can’t remember anything about them.

Katrina O’Neil and Robert Gow in Losing Yourself, courtesy of Accessible Media Inc.

That’s the situation that Katrina O’Neil from Cambridge, Ontario finds herself in. She’s the subject of a new short documentary called Losing Yourself, which depicts her experience reclaiming her life after losing 14 years of her own memory. Katrina suffered a cardiac arrest, and during that time her brain didn’t receive a lot of oxygen. This caused several years of her memory to be erased, including every single memory of her three children.

What’s most interesting about this film isn’t just seeing Katrina’s perspective on the memories she will probably never get back, but seeing the new memories she forms with her children. Their journey is incredibly tough as well, watching the person who raised you and provides for you not know who you are. Seeing the children’s responses is a truly humbling experience, because you can tell these children have gone through the wringer.

Katrina O’Neil in Losing Yourself, courtesy of Accessible Media Inc.

The documentary doesn’t just concern itself with her children though, as Katrina is the focus through and through. What memories she’s missing are made up with new experiences she creates with her loved ones. Filmmaker Robert Gow depicts these moments, the most beautiful of the film, as simply as they can be. Just a mother and her children having fun together. Despite the tough subject material, it’s quite a warm, hopeful watch.

Hope is what drew Gow to this project. He tells me that’s a recurring theme he’s covered with several of his documentaries, including Forced Disappearance (which is about a man on hunger strike protesting the assassination of his friend). He says that for both documentaries, “what attracted me to the story was hope. There are these larger than life figures that overcame tremendous adversity, to ultimately be optimistic, kind loving people.” Despite its depressing beginning, it’s a story of resilient joy in recovery.

Losing Yourself also dives into the science behind the memory loss, specifically the lack of knowledge we have on memory loss. It covers many angles of this story, but always makes sure to centre the experience around Katrina. This documentary shows the process of her reclaiming it, as well as what her life has evolved into. It’s a tough situation, but one that remains eternally hopeful.

Losing Yourself is a beautiful pick-me-up of a film, one that’s sure to keep you shocked and entertained in a heart-warming way. This film gets a 4/5. You can watch it on Accessible Media Inc.’s website, or on YouTube, and you can watch my interview with director Robert Gow below.